Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Chocolate chip M&M cookie? Yes please

sheesh. I tell ya. I cannot stay away from the sweets.  It's ridiculous!  And some a-hole left a pile of chocolate chip & mm's cookies on the counter near my desk. I have a perfectly good pear staring at me pointedly. Bleh.

A Confession: We moved last weekend to our wonderful new house. I spent Monday organizing our bedroom and bathroom. The way I put things away in the cabinet in the bathroom (although awesome in it's categorical organization) and did not allow room for our super-sized bottle of mouthwash. So it was on the counter.

The Captain, unbeknownst to me, came in and reorganized the cabinet to fit the Listerine. When I opened the cabinet to get something later that evening, I nearly started to hyperventilate because NOTHING...WAS...IN... THE...SAME... PLACE!!! AND the stuff was  no longer organized by product type and use.

I'm sorry to say I seriously had a little Rainman breakdown, The Captain started speaking very quietly and backing slowly out of the bathroom while I muttered insanely, moving all products back to their original position... THE ORIGINAL POSITION!! 'whywouldIwantnailpolishremoverbymynightcream,itneedstobebymynailpolishandwhat

After I had recovered from my episode I breathlessly thanked The Captain profusely for letting me have a complete neurotic breakdown and letting me leave the mouthwash on the counter!

He's the best.

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

The smartest fetus ever

Ultrasound update: We had our 30-week ultrasound today and The Pickle is 'head-down' finally! She's been breech for two months which was concerning me, but a couple of days ago I felt some serious shifting around in there and suspected that she had changed position. Sure enough, she's now feet-up and ready to go. She's such a smart fetus...

She's also measuring big. She's in the 66th percentile for size (translation: she's 16% bigger than average). This is fantastic because it gives me ammo when the people say 'You're so smaaalll! Are you sure you're eating enough for the BABY?!'  I can now say, 'Yes, I sure am. She's a fatty. I have data to prove it. Thank you for asking'

She was sucking on her umbilical cord during the visit. What. A. Weirdo.

Large and in charge update: Pregnancy annoyance #67. I'm really clumsy right now and drop things constantly when I'm too big to easily pick them up. The Irony.

Something weird I've noticed: I was recently talking to someone about the pregnancy information site's weekly fetal development updates. For some reason, when trying to illustrate the current size of the fetus for the pregnant mom, they consistently equate it to an obscure food item (usually a fruit or vegetable, but sometimes a nut), like a kumquat or a persimmon. 

Sometimes they run out of ideas and your baby is 'the size of a medium carrot'. What the....? Because your curious, I'll tell you, currently this baby is the size of a Chinese cabbage. Not a regular cabbage. A Chinese cabbage.

It is important to specify because you could be thinking my baby looks more like this.
But she doesn't.

Shirking update: The best time to move? Is when you're pregnant. We're moving this weekend and I will be doing such low impact things as lining the cabinets, hanging up clothes and putting away dishes. I'm so bummed. So bummed .;)

We got some okay pictures of her today, but nothing incredible. She had her face smooshed up against the wall of the uterus, so no 3d this time. And just the usual gorgeous profile was available. I won't bore you with all my baby pictures.....yet, :insertevillaugh:



Monday, May 10, 2010

Large and in charge

I don't know how two weeks got by without some insane post from Drinking Dirty Martinis! However in the last couple of weeks there has not been that much to report which is a very good thing.

My 29th week starts tomorrow. All the 'extenders' I have bought for my bras are at capacity. I am currently (tightly) fitting into size Large underwear..*WARNING* if I have to purchase extra-large underwear I may have a breakdown... and I still have more than two months to go.

I'm tired again, not nearly as bone-tired as I was in the first trimester but just tired. A nap always sounds good. The captain and I took a mini-break at the beach over Mother's Day weekend and spent nearly all Sunday napping and reading. Oh blessed day.

I hate clothes right now. HATE! And those of you who know exactly how many clothing items I actually possess (I have a LOT of clothes) will find that shocking. I don't want to buy the super cute/hip (and super expensive) maternity clothes that I will only wear once (yes I'm looking at you Pea in the Pod, you and your ridiculously priced maternity tops and pants) so instead I've augmented all my empire waist dresses and yoga pants with the super-tent-like and affordable maternity clothes that make me look ghastly, GHASTLY!

In the third trimester, a common affliction is the Charley Horse and he has visited me recently. No one (yes I'm looking at you experienced Obstetricians and Perinatologists who paid ridiculous amounts for your educations) seems to know why they occur but CRIPES! It is awful. If you've had one before you know what I'm talking about. I've gotten them occasionally over the years but the other night (or early morning rather) it hit both legs within an hour of one another. It's basically an excruciating leg cramp, that is so vicious your calves are actually sore the following day and they usually occur while your sleeping and thus you are violently wakened in the wee hours by the sensation that someone is trying to wrench your leg off at the knee, I kid you not. So I practiced my Yoga (soon to be Labor) Breathing and threw some f-bombs in there for good measure. My favorite part was when The Captain woke a little due to  my agonized moans and groggily muttered before falling right back to sleep after the second attack 'That's a crappy way to wake up...ouch'. You know another crappy way to wake up? With a pillow over your face... Just sayin'...

My Baby Shower is coming up! Wow, thinking of myself in the context of a baby shower (mine or anyone else's) has never been comfortable. But I'm pretty excited. Mostly because all my favorite ladies will be there. I love all my favorite ladies. That's why they're my favorite.

I hope all is well with you. Me and The Pickle are cruisin right along.

Here is a picture of the belly. It's a little bigger now as that picture was a couple of weeks ago. But you get the idea.



PS Congratulations to my friend Lauren who had a beautiful baby boy on May 4th. Welcome to the world Hunter! It's pretty cool here. I think you'll like it.