Thursday, April 22, 2010

Let the third trimester.... COMMENCE

I can't believe I'm already in the third trimester.

Updates:  Most importantly, I do NOT have the

which is awesome news. I failed my first screening, but passed the awful 4 hour test easily.  I don't know how or why. That whole testing process seems like a lot of hooey to me. But I can continue to berate myself for horking down jelly donuts regularly. Which is great.

Testing bonus: They couldn't get my left arm to give any blood so all FIVE draws came from my right. I look like someone has been handling me very roughly and cannot currently wear short sleeves out of the house...

Kick counts: I was given a Kick Count Chart at my last OB visit. This chart is hilarious to me because the way it is formatted. I'm supposed to log how many hours it takes to feel ten kicks, rolls, right hooks, left hooks, pretty much any movement, and I'm supposed to do this during her active time (apparently there's a specific and isolated time during which babies are usually more active...someone should let my kid know this). 

After I picked myself up off the floor from laughing so hard I decided 'what the hell, this should be fun'.  This is a sample of a few days of kick counting. That first duration, that's not 1 hr and 26 min. That's right it's 1min and 26 seconds. And that's the longest it's taken for me to feel ten kicks.

Apr 17, 2010 9:21 AM:
Duration = 0:01:26
Kicks = 10

Apr 18, 2010 8:33 AM:
Duration = 0:00:52
Kicks = 10

Apr 19, 2010 8:31 AM:
Duration = 0:00:25
Kicks = 10

Apr 20, 2010 2:11 PM:
Duration = 0:00:28
Kicks = 10

I'm not counting the teeny little nudges either. Just the ones that are so hard they are visible...from the outside 'An active baby means a healthy baby' my OB says in this chipper sing-song voice. An active baby means a sleepy mommy is what I say. I have to wake up to pee about three times a night and when I do, she's up... and havin a hoe-down, even implementing some new moves, specifically one I call the Travolta or The Feevah

Her position is breech, which is totally fine at this stage in the pregnancy, but that's how I know she's partying in there like it's 1977 with that finger pointing up and a leg pointing down. Other Hoe-Down moves feel a lot like Jed Clampett dancing around the spouting oil font in the opening credits of the Beverly Hillbillies, riiiiight on my bladder. awesome.

Dreams: They're getting a lot weirder. That is all you need to know.

Snoogle: Oh blessed Snoogle, you look like a tapeworm but you feel like you're made of Awesome at an Awesome Factory.

My sister-in-law gave me this and it has really helped with my sciatica (sciatica, scientifically defined is a 'OH HOLY CRAP!!!  WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?!?! stabbing kind of pain on the right side of my lower back, in a somewhat center of the butt cheek kind of a location...if you want to get technical about it.)  The snoogle has been amazing in relieving this pain and has really improved the quality of sleep I get when I actually get it. So big props and thank yous to Julie.

Injustices I've Suffered: My OB reprimanded me for gaining 6 lbs last month, putting me at a grand total of 11 lbs gained two-thirds of the way through the pregnancy. I'm supposed to gain somewhere between 25-35 lbs by the end. She is outrageous... I am OUTraged  ;)


There she is, at our last ultrasound visit on the 20th. She looks all grumpy, like the diabeetus cat...




  1. She does look grumpy. Only because she hasn't quite perfected snarky yet ;)

  2. Is snark passed on GENETICALLY?! :o